Bridesmaids

For EVER people were telling me that I needed to watch Bridesmaids and I regret not listening to people sooner.
 
The part that makes me sad is how much attention this movie gets for being funny AND by women! Can you even imagine that women are funny?
Duh.
Of course they're funny.
They're half the people on the planet.
Statistically, some of us might be funny.
Also, statistically, some men are not funny.
You guys, we should be so far beyond this by now.

When someone points out that something I'm involved with is, "a funny flock of females," or something equally alliterative, I appreciate it, sure, but I also want to dismiss it so quickly. It cheapens the compliment when it's conditional. Women have been making people laugh for a while. Sure. But why do we need to even address sex?
You're making me feel uncomfortable.
Take the emphasis off the gender and focus it on the joke itself.

Ok- I'll keep going...If a man were pooping in a sink would we be laughing, or would we be grossed out?
I'm a person who was sort of laughing during that scene. It was more from surprise though, than actual amusement. Had a man hopped up on the basin and shouted "LOOK AWAY!" it's very possible that I would have left the room, gagging.

There really weren't any strong male characters in this one. The cop was totally adorable, but he--along withe all the other guys- were just sort of fodder. The whole thing could have been done without them. They were bland and pretty much interchangeable. I'm imagining the whole movie done again, but with some plastic lego men in any role played by a man. Things may have just gotten a little funnier in my head.

And I think it's cheap of women to try to hitch a ride on the success of those performers. They aren't funny because they're female, but now they've got all these girls grasping to hold on and say "that's us!" that's not us. That's them. That's good writers, a talented cast, amazing costume designers. I don't feel liberated by any of it. I feel completely disconnected. I can relate to some aspects, but not because I'm a girl. It's because the themes are universal. That's why the movie was a success. because so many people could connect in some way.

It seems like they (no idea who that refers to...) are trying to make us decide whether women are funny, or men are funny. I want people to be funny. Or people can be kind of dull, and the funny can happen on it's own externally. That's okay too.

I think this goes to show that I need to watch more movies starring Hulk Hogan or geometrical pattern clothed madness.

The week before I watched this, Sam and I decided to cut my hair because the girls on Girls are so young and now I am 31. They don't have real jobs, they wear whatever they want, and they hang around with a guy you can't decide if you like. This inspired us to chop some bangs on my head. She's the only one aside from me (and the very occasional professional) that I really trust to wield scissors.

So now we've got this other movie- and the girls are actually my age- and they have cute hair too.
But we've just hacked some bangs and I'm realizing that if I'm going to watch things with Sam, I'm going to have to have to request less attractive people. Again- more Hulk Hogan. I don't want his hair.
I don't need his awesome style. I can let my own hair grow for a minute instead.


Note: I did like this movie! Apparently this reads like I didn't. I think it's less that I didn't like the way people talked about it. The movie itself, that was funny.

SING!

If someone offers your the opportunity to watch Mr. Nanny and you haven't seen it before, do yourself a favor and take them up on this offer.

While getting this classic piece of cinematic art ready to go, I ended up learning a lot of things.

Do the Right Thingis not Pay it Forward.
Spike Lee is not Spike Jonze.
Neither of them are Tommy Lee Jones.

I am one of the most confused people of them all.

Mr. Nanny was super into the big man in a little chair thing. Hulk Hogan has a real first name (it's Terry), and the little girl from The Nanny was also in Mr. Nanny. They also chose maybe the dumpiest boy of all time to play the kid from The Nanny's brother. Part of me feels really terrible for calling a kid dumpy, but the rest of me recognizes that he probably has a good heart and a bad costume designer. Maybe he was actually very stylish in his real life.

The best part of the movie, the only thing that actually had me laugh and required me to use my inhaler, and rewind to rewatch a bunch of times--it was so funny that Sam took a screenshot- was when the kid turned into a monster and got all demand-y.

When the kid said "SING!" I almost died and Sam made this.

Not exaggerating: two four days later I was by myself in H&M and I thought "SING!" and I started laughing so hard that the woman there probably thought I was trying to sneak jewelry into my pockets or some awful thing like that. They kind of came over to check on me. I'm 31, but I had to run away like junior high.

I'm no exception-

At six this morning I was up and upset because I realized that I'm a dead ringer for Little Lord Fauntleroy.

I don't know the difference between Little Lord Fauntleroy and myself without makeup.

Watching a Movie With Dogs

Two dogs and I sat down to watch Groundhog Day, in honor of Goundhog Day, but we messed up. Somehow we missed the first fifteen minutes. I'm not going to blame either of them because they're dogs, but I'll still say "we" messed up because I don't want to be held solely accountable for this sad fact.

Without having seen the movie, I knew how it would go. It's definitely the only movie regularly referenced on February 2nd forever, and I guess if someone tries to tell you about it, they only need to spend about three minutes, and if you've got a brain, you can just replay the scene with the changes that inevitably happened.

It feels like a joke as I'm typing it, but even thought I've never seen that movie, I swear I felt like I'd already been through it before. Just hearing about it made it so familiar, and it was exactly as described by so many people over so many years.

Missing the first fifteen minutes, I'm not even joking, was a horrible idea. I know the movie basically does the same thing over and over, but we had no idea how it started. One of the dogs just walked out of the room about ten minutes in, and the other one and I sort of sat there enjoying Bill Murray's face and Andie MacDowell's vest for an hour and a half. A genius decided to play the movie all day long on AMC, which would have probably been so great if I'd ever seen the start, but after it was done and was just starting again, I didn't end up watching to see what I'd missed. This was actually a perfect opportunity and I blew it.

I'm going to add to the list of people I don't know the difference between!

I can't tell the difference between Chris Elliott and Daniel Stern.

I sincerely thought that the camera guy was also a Wet Bandit.

Probably the best discovery I had was finally seeing Ned "The Head" Ryerson. I think I've heard that name so often, than when I realized what was happening on the screen I sort of startled the dog with my reaction.

Also, I haven't seen Caddyshack yet, but is the groundhog scene in this is a lot like that gopher scene in that? It sort of reminded me of a better version of the jackalope that Dave Coulier had on America's Funniest People.